Note to Myself # 18
This is a big one for me
because one of my assets is loyalty
to people I love.
I will cheer them on
tell them when I think they're making a mistake
urge them to take a chance when the risk seems reasonable
and pick them up when they've fallen.
That's what friends (or family) do for each other,
at least in my world view.
So my admonition is
"Always stand by your friends."
At the same time,
I know that there's a Shadow side to loyalty.
It can make you blind to instances
where loyalty isn't a two-way street
and a person's behavior is deserving
of no-nonsense boundaries. . . .
including expulsion from your realm
until they've repented of their unacceptable actions.
Lying to or about you, for instance.
Being emotionally abusive.
Expecting you to always be there for them
even when they're never around when you need them
Excessive loyalty can sometimes make you blind
to truths that everyone else can see.
Sometimes to be loyal to yourself,
you have to cut the ties that bind
and walk away.