Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Snow Day Misery



Here's my post to FinallyMe.com today:


It's a snow day here. Schools are closed and roads are treacherous. The kind of day you stay inside and eat oatmeal or mashed potatoes, at least if you're me.  The kind of day that I go through my email inbox to sort out what's a keeper and what can go, all because I know I have a couple of tasks to work on and my brain is a little sluggish from the cold.

One of the emails was of the "here are your online dating matches -- aren't you excited?" variety.  Clicked on it to find three so-called specimens. . . uh, make that candidates. So I read the first profile.

Now my general position at this point is that I enjoy my own company and have great girlfriends, so a man is optional. On the other hand, I maintain the belief that it never hurts to look because you might find someone special whose company you enjoy even more than your own.

Not today. Today, looking mangled my sensibilities.

Here's the profile (with a couple of details altered for privacy, though I don't know why I should care):
I m 56 in body and 19 in desires. I have been married 2 tlmes. Once 4 32 years with 2 daughters. She passed away then, i met and married the wrong women 8 months ago. We serated because i was not getting enough some other thing that i will tell in private, but not here. The person i want to meet must be super affectionnut (in private) . I have been married to once a week ladyies, But, never again. I require severral times a day without strings attached. My social life is quite and in small groups that I love to be with. Only positive people. I do not want to be around negitive people. I want a friend with benifits that we both want. I do not want a one way friendship. Dont contact me if you want to change me. Only women who likes giving and recieving most types of play are willing to try it need aply for my body. We must both like exploring each other. My most passionate thing is governments that do not solve the homless problem.

He lists his politics as conservative.  I notice he says he married the wrong "women" 8 months ago, which makes me wonder about the small groups he loves to be with. 

I have no interest in this one (gosh, gee whiz -- are you thinking I'm too picky?) and, as a result,  I'm willing to share the riches. Please contact me if you're a several times a day without strings attached lady. (Is that a non-sequiter?) I'll put you in touch.  

Any takers out there?

2 comments:

Madge @ The View From Right Here said...

I'm kinda liking the snow... we get it so seldom. It is SO pretty! I went out for a drive this morning and it was beautiful, quiet, just me and a few semis!

Cheryl said...

OMG! The guy can't even spell.. That would've stopped be right there but I kept reading. He's a horny old bastard isn't he? I can think of a myriad of things to do "several times a day" and he isn't one of them. Thanks for the laugh.