Note to Myself No. 16
To be totally honest, when you're the reluctant partner in the end of a marriage (or marriage-like relationship), even if you're the one who says "I can't do this anymore" and precipitates the rupture, actually severing the heart connection is WAY harder than terminating the legal connection. The Beatles sang "gotta get you into my heart." Easy stuff. Develop an attachment, fall in love, and BAM! The object of your desire is there, in your thoughts, your longings, your dreams, your heart. Reverse engineering should be just as simple. But it's not. Turns out that -- at least for long-term, wholehearted relationships, getting somebody out of your heart takes a whole hell of a lot longer and tons more effort & intention that getting them in your heart in the first place. When your heart gets broken, you've got to put yourself back together piece b...