Note to Myself 2018: No. 11
Let's face it: nobody's perfect. Each of us is a hot mess of contradictions. Sometimes patient and kind, sometimes snappish and irritable. Shadow and light. Light and shadow. Even our most cherished qualities have a negative side. For example, being loving and forgiving is generally seen as a positive thing. But, if inappropriately overdone, it can lead to enabling, becoming a doormat, turning the other cheek when the offending party has no interest in curbing his or her egregious behavior. And those negative parts of ourselves that we're critical of? Those bouts of aggravation tell us our boundaries are being violated and we need to act. . . to confront someone's behavior that violates our standards or threatens our self-esteem. Or to examine what is putting us on red alert in order to see whether we're reacting appropriately to a here-and-now violation or whether so...